Welcome to Megaplex's monthly newsletter alerting the up-market shopper to the new and interesting in northern Sandton and Bryanston. Please feel free to support our advertisers! To subscribe, see our subscription page.
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Changes in RivoniaThe Chinese invasion of Rivonia, that started with Rivonia Centre (369 Rivonia Boulevard, corner 11th Avenue) being taken over by Speed Wagon Property, continues. Rivonia Square on Rivonia Boulevard and Ninth Avenue, which had lost most of its tenants over the course of time, has now become Oriental City Rivonia. Large and small Chinese shops are moving in at a pace; well over half the shopping area appears to be occupied already. The section of small stalls that failed to get off the ground as "The Penitentiary" is now being refitted and occupied by several dozen similarly small stalls. We have renamed our Rivonia Square web page as Oriental City Rivonia and made a start on listing the shops. You probably would be best off visiting the centre in person. Most of the shopkeepers do not have e-mail, and phoning them would be an interesting exercise as their English, when they speak any at all, is limited.
New on the Block Back to top
Odd Jobs"My uncle's a criminal lawyer." "Aren't they all?" Restaurant Review by Judith Back to top* Piza e Vino, The Wedge Shopping Centre, Rivonia RoadWhat a disappointment! 1950's style chairs and tables should have set warning bells ringing. Appalling music, which could not be changed because it comes from the group database, whose compiler appears to be tone deaf. The Butterfly Chardonnay makes me question why Robertson sell it. It is over priced and insipid. We shared a half and half pizza or, to be more exact, a third and two thirds pizza. I chose Gamberi, my partner Americano. The base was very soggy and over cheesed. I had to hunt for the prawns. Two each on two slices and one on the other. The large decorative prawn was overcooked. The rocket was plentiful but there was no sign of the garlic. The Americano jalapenos were hot, despite my partner being assured they wouldn't be, and the rest of his two thirds uninteresting. Altogether a meal designed to completely disappoint. Sam the waiter said he would bring our complaint to management's attention, presumably at some time in the future, as no-one dealt with it before we left.
Funny Language, English...News item: "Traffic volumes have reached 300 cars an hour through Three Sisters in the Free State". Mathematically-inclined readers will already have calculated that that averages out at 100 cars per hour per Sister. Green TipA rain gauge from your local hardware shop makes a great gift for the nerd in your life. Particularly when paired with Software Africa's free Rainfall Spreadsheet with Statistics, available here.
Festive Season Thoughts...A hangover is the wrath of grapes. Reading while sunbathing makes you well red. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses. Once you've seen one shopping centre, you've seen the mall. Gone... Back to top
Dangerous Food
Did you hear that Julius is addicted to
brake fluid? He says it's OK, he can stop any time he wants
to.
Revealed! The Identity of "Bleep" Bank! Back to topWho would have thought? It's Capitec (AKA Crapitec)! My account at the Morning Glen Mall branch was made dormant, so I had to get the FICA done again. What a business: It took three visits! First, they would not accept –as other banks do– proof of residence from my landlord with a utility bill addressed to it. No, they wanted an "Employer Confirmation Letter". When I produced that, their slovenly gum-chewing Assistant Manager made up his own rule that I wasn't, as a CC member of my own CC, allowed to sign my own company's letter, and demanded that I produce exactly the same letter, still signed by my partner but without my signature! I then went next door to Nedbank, queued, and got a bank statement from them and, just to make sure, a listing of my personal details. He would not accept these documents either, on the grounds that it did not comply exactly with their "FICA info" document which specified that my residential address had to appear on the bank statement. The Branch Manager showed no concern whatsoever to help me either. So I finally re-did the letter without my signature. I posted the short version of the saga on Hello Peter and the Morning Glen web page, and invoiced the bank for my time. Capitec got back to me rapidly with partial compensation and a promise that the Regional Manager would call me, which he did with an apology 21 days after the incident. However the problem staff at the branch have not been removed (fired, preferably, but a transfer to Hotazel might suffice), so I warn you: You deal with them at peril of your sanity. How sad that Capitec, which showed such promise, has so quickly become hide-bound by its rules and lost sight of its customers. And a Warning About Virgin Mobile......as if one were needed for anything "Virgin"! An acquaintance had her cell phone stolen and needed to block it. Virgin Mobile insisted that the Blacklisting form be faxed to them and refused to accept the scanned form by e-mail. So we faxed it, to be told that they take 48 hours to issue the ITC number –presumably to make sure that the criminals have ample time to get away! When we enquired 48 hours later, they wanted more information. I complained on Hello Peter and they responded to say they do accept e-mail, but this person wanted completely different information. Do NOT deal with Virgin Mobile, they do their best to stymie the customer. The Checkout: Your Special Gift for Christmas / ChriFSMas / Chanukah / Solstice / Yule / Hogmanay / New Year / End-of-the-World – a Round Tuit:
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Your name in print! Would you like to contribute a shop- or restaurant review, a joke, or something else for this Newsletter? Please e-mail us. You will get full credit (unless you want anonymity). Reach 4828 shoppers and shop-owners: Advertise in this newsletter! Editor: Rick Raubenheimer.