If it's Free, Why Must I Pay?

Have you noticed that a lot of things marked 'Free", aren't?  Take Range Eggs, for example.  They're boldly marked as "Free", but there's a price attached. One can, perhaps, understand it with eggs, which have always been misleadingly packaged: Small as "large", medium as "extra large", and large as "jumbo" –as if elephants laid eggs?

The newest entry to the scam is a lager called "Castle Free". It may be free of castles, even of alcohol, but it certainly isn't gratis.  Which reminds me of Builders Warehouse selling hollow doors marked "Solid", apparently because that is the (deliberately misleading) name of the company that makes them.  But that's another story...

Odd Jobs

'A neighbour in NC complained that the plants a landscaper sold her as "heavenly bamboo" weren’t actually a bamboo at all, but the shrub Nandina domestica. We had to acknowledge that she had, perhaps, truly been bamboozled.' –
Patricia O’Day, Bend, Oregon in AWADmail Issue 855.
 

New on the Block, Movers and Shakers  Back to top

• The Tea Merchant has moved from Upper Level in Bryanston Shopping Centre to Benmore Gardens Shopping Centre – Loose leaf tea, teapots, cups, accessories – a complete tea solution. Free shipping on orders over R500.
• FNB ATM, Upper Level in The Wedge, Morningside – Left of the entrance to Superspar, right of the lift to lower parking.
• FNB ATM, in Morningview Shopping Centre – Hut in the parking area right in front of STK Grill House.
• Doppio Zero Bryanston, Shop D04, D: Main Square Northwest in Hobart Grove Centre – Mediterranean Restaurant: Pizza, pasta, steak, fish.
• Thai Elephant, Ground in Early Dawn Mall – Thai Restaurant. Located in the passage from Byblos Café to Sheikh's Palace.
• Rivonia Thai Massage, Shop 18, Ground in Early Dawn Mall – Open 10:00–22:00 daily. All Major Credit Cards accepted.
• Grayston Medical Suites / Ubuntu Family Health Centre (LG1 under the Pharmacy), Ground in Grayston Shopping Centre – Baby Clinic, Biokineticist, Chiropractor, Psychologist, Dietician, General Practitioners, Paediatric Nurse, Physiotherapist, Podiatrist, Psychiatrist, Travel Clinic.

Restaurant Reviews by Judith Back to top

***** STK Grill House, Morningview Shopping Centre

Newly opened and very friendly owner and staff. All menus are on boards and there's a good choice of portion sizes. My drink, as usual, was Sauvignon Blanc whilst my partner went back to Appletizer. I had a beautiful rare rump, after rejecting the first one for being over done, with creamed spinach. My partner had a medium rump (with pap balls, not worth repeating).

Sammy was our efficient waiter and we can definitely recommend this venue

Contact Details for STK Grill House.  Back to top

**** Doppio Zero Bryanston, Hobart Grove Centre

Recently opened replacement for Junipa's: unfortunately, it is a very noisy venue. Our waiter was Prince and service was good. Appletizer and Chardonnay were ordered, Then I chose the Salmon and Avo sandwich and my partner the Chicken Caesar Salad.

Worth going to if you're not worried by noise!

Contact Details for Doppio Zero Bryanston.  Back to top

Funny Language, English...

If government bureaucracy has gone mad, can we call it “bureaucrazy”?

Out of the Game:  Back to top

• Creative Food Concepts in Early Dawn Mall – catering company specializing in stimulating flavours, innovative presentation and high quality service. Was in the passage from Byblos Café to Sheikh's Palace.

Africa – the Dark Continent:

No Load Shedding? Even when you expect Eskom to disappoint you, it still disappoints you.

News from City of Joburg

The information below from Johannesburg Ward 117's DA Councillor Tim Truluck.

Election Update

Election Day will be Wednesday 8 May, just as Councillor Tim predicted (who needs "Prophet" Bushiri?).

This triggered an election timetable that includes:

• 26 Feb: The proclamation of the election date in the Government Gazette which closed the voters roll;
• Mid-March to 18 Apr: Special Votes applications (yes, you can apply now);
• 23 Apr: Publication of final lists of candidates;
• 6/7 May: Special voting days (no, you cannot have a postal vote or vote online).

Valuation Update - Avoiding the Section 52 Review

I have been assured that the Valuations Team is on target to complete the 50 000 objections by the end of February. The problem is for residents who requested notification by post as it can take a few months for your Objection Outcome letter to arrive.

The Valuation Department has moved out of the Civic Centre to 66 Jorissen Street in Braamfontein. Parking is a problem, so I would advise Ubering in and out. It is pretty quick as you are just handing in your appeal docs. [Ahem, not quite! I still had to queue for over half an hour just to hand the form in –Editor]

You can download the Appeal Forms here: Residential Forms; Business Forms.

Once your Objection has been processed, your rates will account will start reflecting the new value. You now must pay the amount on your statement for rates, even if you have appealed. It takes about 3 months to reconcile your account - there is no need to do anything on your part yet.

Pensioners whose properties were valued above the R2.5 million threshold for rebates and who successfully got it down to below this value by objecting must then apply for anew for their rebate. They will not get it backdated unfortunately. For those whose value is still still too high, you must appeal and only once you have been successful at the Appeals Board in a year or so, can you then apply for rebate. Again, it will not be backdated.

For details on how to avoid the Dreaded Section 52 Review, which takes place in secret, see our December 2018 newsletter.

Overheard at the Checkout

"How did the visit to the Doctor go?"

"He said everything I have is 'age-appropriate'."

"That's good...?"

"It wasn't as reassuring as you might think: At some stage it will be 'age-appropriate' for me to die!"