Welcome to Megaplex's monthly newsletter! We alert the up-market stay-at-homer to the new and interesting in Sandton and Bryanston. Please feel free to support our advertisers! To subscribe, see our subscription page.
With lockdown in place since the last newsletter, our visits to shopping centres have been drastically curtailed.
We can report that in Morning Glen Mall, the only shops open are Food Lovers Market upstairs and, on the lower level, Clicks, Absolute Pets (for pet food only) and Pick 'n Pay Supermarket. All other shops are not open for Lockdown. This includes Woolworths, Capitec Bank, the Post Office, and Postnet. In 90 Degrees on Rivonia, only the Spar is open –and now cannot sell precooked food or even bake bread on the premises. That's possibly due to Eusebius McKaiser blabbing on Radio 702 about Woolworths' roasted chicken!
The larger shops are taking social distancing seriously. Most have marked out separation lines at the tills, and some at their entrances too. Clicks still has no face marks for sale. Superspar at The Wedge has reduced "Traiding Hours" (picture). Spar Tops and all other bottle stores are closed as required, to the great regret of some.
It seems that police (not that we've seen any in Morningside) don't want couples sitting next to each other in cars, even if they sleep next to each other at night. How odd. Perhaps we should teach the dog to drive, and both sit in the back seat? (Update: I have been reminded that the dog is under 18, and hence not eligible for a licence)
What with other spirits being unavailable, one needs a sense of humour to keep one's spirits up.
However, for many, the poor in particular, lockdown is no laughing matter. Last night, President Ramaphosa announced far-reaching relief measures. Will they be far-reaching enough to reach those that need them? Instead of disappearing into the pockets of the corrupt?
We wish our readers good health and survival through the pandemic. Further down we have some ways to grow (other than fat) during Lockdown.
If government issues a proclamation preventing the sale of all bedding, is it a "blanket statement"?
New on the Block, Movers and Shakers Back to top
Restaurant Review Memories by Judith Back to top
Remember "restaurants"? Here are two reviews from way before the shutdown:
Newly opened replacement for Junipa, unfortunately, it is a very noisy venue. Our waiter was Prince and service was good. Appletizer and Chardonnay were ordered, Then I chose the Salmon and Avo sandwich and my partner the Chicken Caesar Salad.
Worth going to if you're not worried by noise!
As always, our favourite place and Sharon knows our needs! Tried Doolhof Single Vineyard Sauvignon Blanc for the first time and can recommend it. Lassi Mango is my partner's favourite drink here. A medium Chicken Tikka and a mild Dal Tadka were enjoyed as well.
Funny Language, English....
Now, if you run out of something, you can't always run out and buy more.
Awakened to Eternal Life? Back to top
As mentioned, most businesses are shut at present. We sincerely hope they will reopen. Here are a few that won't:
Thought for the Day:
"If a fight breaks out in every bar you're going to, the problem might be you." – Lori Gottlieb.
It is said that one shouldn't waste a good crisis. With that in mind, what are you doing to emerge as a better person? If you are reading this via email, chances are that you have internet access. Here are some things you can do:
Study Stoic Philosophy
In the public mind, the term "stoic" generally means "bearing misfortunes without complaining or showing emotion". Sounds like something we could use right now? However, Stoic philosophy is much more. It is hardly passive, but rather an action-orientated way of living a virtuous life. It is well suited to life today, even as it was to the ancient Greeks and Romans who originated it: People like Epictetus, Seneca and Emperor Marcus Aurelius. Later proponents include the American Founding Fathers. It is used today by film star and former California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, author Ryan Holiday and podcaster Tim Ferriss. Find out more by subscribing to the Daily Stoic email.
Getting Fat? Instead, Get Fit, Have Fun & Feel Fabulous
You can do this in your the privacy of your home with the help of an online course: Belly Dancing. The words conjure up images of the exotic: Of far-off places filled with mystery and adventure. And this is only one facet of this beautiful and exciting dance. The real adventure is a far more personal one: one that is available to almost every woman who is willing to explore the beauty and mystery that is within her. Your accomplished coach, Charlotte Blignaut, will help you explore this path of fitness, poise, and empowering self-discovery: Special discount during Lockdown only.
Many people are afraid of speaking in public. For some, it is their number one fear, even ahead of death. That means that, at a funeral, they would rather be in the casket than giving the eulogy! Yet you can hardly avoid being asked to "say a few words". When you defend your thesis, ask for that first date, propose, get married, ask for a promotion, ask a customer for the job, get asked for a report on the project... the opportunities are endless, either to cock it up, or to emerge a winner. We admire great orators. Yet they were not born that way. Public speaking is a skill that can be learned. Next to your career itself, it is the biggest way to advance yourself in life. Toastmasters is a worldwide organisation where you can become adequate, then good, then great at speaking in public. It provides a safe, non-judgemental environment to practice, following a structured path. Toastmasters clubs countrywide and internationally are now operating online: A wonderful opportunity to make new friends and contacts. email for an invitation.
Learn Excel Macros
A lot of us use Microsoft Excel spreadsheets, for anything from recipes to minutes to accounts to engineering calculations. There is magic to even a simple =SUM formula that automatically recalculates when the input numbers change. But Excel can also become a drudge: Repeating the same actions day after day, week, and month can make you hate it. What if you could record a repetitive action, and simply play it back the next time, much faster? You can. It's called Excel Macros. Recording is just the beginning. You can then change the macro, for example, to repeat for all cells in a range. However, there are pitfalls. That is why it helps to have a guide. Discounted by over 75% for Lockdown, this online course will get you started: Quick 'n Easy Turbo-Start Excel Macros.
Some More Resources
An offer of Pro Bono support for leaders in transformation from Charlotte Blignaut.
Forbes article on The Case for Collaboration, now more than ever.
Peter Carruthers's FREE CrashProof your Business Course. This outlines what you face if you close during this time, and how to deal with the fallout.
To make sense of the torrent of news (and misinformation), join Peter's Small Business Coronavirus Fallout Support Group on Facebook.
Breathe for Life: breathing and posture, enhancing lung capacity and releasing less-desirable aspects of Ego: The yoga "Breath of Fire".
Do you have no "invisible means of support"? There is a community for the non-religious: Chat to your fellow secularists on Telegram.
"The back of this couch is in poor condition."
"How about if we put it up against a wall?"
"And shoot it?"
Your name in print! Would you like to contribute a lockdown tip, a less obscure joke, or something else for this Newsletter? Please e-mail us. You will get full credit (unless you want anonymity). Reach 5,585 shoppers and shop-owners: Advertise in this newsletter! Editor: Rick Raubenheimer.